Kenyataan

Hal yang paling sulit dilakukan adalah menerima kenyataan yang tidak sesuai dengan harapanmu.

Semuanya terlihat indah di awal hingga pada akhirnya, kamu mengetahui bahwa kamu memang tidak mampu untuk menjadi pendamping hidupnya.

Memang aku sama sekali tidak layak. Aku terlalu fokus pada apa yang tidak kumiliki, pada kelemahanku. Aku bukanlah orang yang dapat diandalkan. Dan aku tidak pernah ada di sana ketika ia membutuhkan seseorang.

Hidupku telah banyak berubah. Bahkan orang yang dulunya paling mengetahui sisi baik dan burukku dan menerimanya, mengatakan bahwa aku berubah menjadi lebih buruk. Aku kehilangan sesuatu dan aku harus menemukan itu sebelum aku dapat menjadi orang yang layak untuk siapapun.

Bahkan sekarang aku tidak tahu bagaimana caranya menulis, dulu, semuanya mengalir dengan lancar. Sekarang, setiap kata harus kupikirkan terlebih dahulu. Aku mudah menyerah, aku kurang gigih. Aku punya banyak mimpi tetapi tidak satu pun yang kuusahakan untuk tercapai.

Itulah kenyataan. Ketika kamu tidak layak untuk memperoleh sesuatu, kamu tidak akan mendapatkannya, betapa pun kamu menginginkannya. Life doesn't work that way. Ketika kamu menginginkan sesuatu, kamu harus menjadi orang yang pantas untuk menerima hal tersebut. Dan aku sadar, aku telah kehilangan banyak hal positif yang dulunya ada padaku, bagaimana aku dapat membuat orang lain termotivasi.

Seperti biasa, ketika aku gagal, aku akan selalu mendoakan hal yang sama: semoga ia bahagia dengan orang yang dicintainya. Because I love you but I don't fight hard enough to make you happy.

Happiness

You can feel the earthquake. You suffer the loss, but one way or another, you will live through it. People will eventually find their happiness. It's just a matter of time.

April. Such a tough month. Finding out a fact, a fact that you don't wanna hear. Having a lot of work in the worst situation, resulting in many mistakes. Bad things happen, time went by in such a hurry, when you realize, it's been a long gone.

Why is it so hard to be brave? Why should you throw away a chance, the only chance you have, after these tough years, you throw it and now you felt like you are really a worthless person? Why do you keep hoping when it's the fact that really matters?

People keep saying that when there's chance, they'll do it. In fact, they just miss the chances or when the chances come, they just don't know how to use it. And they will keep saying the first sentence.

There's only one way to be happy: make use of the chance. Be ready to take the chance. When it comes, try to do the best. All the things you're doing in the past are to fix the mistakes you've made. And they're going from bad to worse, not the opposite.

Even in the worst situation of your life, there'll always be someone who's going to listen to your grumbling, cheer you up, or just make you laugh. And you really need to pray for that someone's happiness and say, thank you for helping you, eventhough she's the one you hurt the most in the past.

Well, everyone will be happy. It's just a matter of time, even the one you like and you fail to impress. She will definitely be happy, whether you're there or not. But, it will be better if you keep praying for her happiness.

Because eventually, everyone will find their happiness.

Chocolate

A chocolate is not a cure to your problems, but it is what makes you smile, and your smile is the most important one.

Adult life is indeed hard. You have to face thousands of difficulties. Your work, relationship, family, and even small things can be your problems. You may have the bravery to face it all, but have you ever felt so fed up with all of your problems?

There's always a day when you feel it's a horrible one. Things don't go like what you expect. Every people talk shit about you. You wanna hide somewhere, but there's no place to hide. You need a help, but no one helps you. You wanna cry out loud, but you just can't.

At that very moment, you'll need a stress relieve, a thing that will make you feel better. The small brown thing, a bittersweet, yet a powerful thing. A chocolate.

That when you feel desperate, weak and want to run away, remember this little thing: chocolate. Because when you eat it, you'll smile again, you'll become stronger, and you'll be brave enough to face your problems.

Remember one thing : chocolate is your partner of stress, but he won't help you solve your problems. He can only make you smile and when you smile, you'll have the power to face it. And after then, you'll smile again, even brighter :)

P.S : Don't eat too much or you'll have another problems

To the brave one out there working hard to reach your dream.